My name is Joycka. Step into my world, where my heart is filled with love for one child. Having grown up as a single child, I always fantasized about a large family. But when the time came for me to become a parent, everything changed.
Growing up as an only child
I was an only child. I did wonder what it would be like to have siblings in my life. But I am not sure if it was really a loss. When I look back, I realize that my childhood was fuller and richer specifically because I was an only child. For example, our house was small, and another child would have forced us to move to a bigger house. Staying in our house meant that we were able to save money and enjoy adventures and annual trips.
In my childhood, I had always proclaimed that I wanted to have two children when I grew up. My partner, however, who grew up with several siblings, was intent on having only one child right from the start. We decided to leave the decision until after we had our first child.
So my heart, our heart, is full: Full of love – for one child.
And then Lucy arrived
I didn’t enjoy being pregnant with Lucy, our daughter. I was nauseous for a long time and then had to make many adjustments due to gestational diabetes. However, the delivery went smoothly, and I would do it again in a heartbeat. But once Lucy was there, I felt complete. The amount of love you can feel love for such a small creature is indescribable. The desire for a second child vanished completely.
First and foremost, because my heart is full. Full of love – for one child. I honestly cannot imagine that I would feel as much love for a second child. Or that I would still have space next to that which is now all consumed by my love for Lucy.
Moreover, I find parenting to be quite intense. I am the director of a small association and I also want to grow in that job and continue to take on challenges. Besides, I want to be the best mom possible. I spend all my free time with my daughter. We play, do crafts, go for walks and excursions … All with the greatest of pleasure but also with immense challenges.
Thirdly, financial considerations play a role as well. I want to give my daughter everything she needs in life. Perhaps she may want to take the most expensive course there is when she grows up? Then I want to give her those opportunities. I don’t want to limit Lucy’s options and opportunities. Also in terms of health costs. She is perfectly healthy now, and of course we hope it will stay that way. But you never know what life will bring you and what challenges we will have to face.
"Choosing to have one child is choosing to pour all of your love, energy, and dedication into nurturing a single soul, ensuring it thrives in a world filled with endless possibilities."
Being an only child, is that not rather pitiable?
And what do other people say? That is of no concern at all. People often ask us if there will be a second child. People should not ask such questions. No, we don’t want another one, and our opinion is clear. But what if we wanted to, but couldn’t?
And is it a “pity” for our daughter? No siblings to play with? Well, her best friend is our Swiss shepherd dog. In addition, she has tons of friends in class and in our circle of friends. She is growing, flourishing and happy!
The only thing I sometimes worry about is what will happen when my partner and I are no longer around. Will Lucy be on her own then? Being an only child myself, that is a concern for me. But I have a wonderful partner and a lovely circle of friends that I can always rely on, so I am convinced that the same will be true for Lucy.